Thursday, April 22, 2010

The One In Which I Break The Cardinal Girl Rule And Tell My Weight

"Hi, come on in! Just watch out for that mess there, don't step in it. Yes, that's my legs, in a puddle on the floor. I'd like you to meet my new friend, the elliptical."

That's right, folks, I'm now exercising.

I got an elliptical at a garage sale last weekend. (Thanks, Lisa!) I have a desire to be in shape. Yes, I am aware that round is a shape, but I'd just like my round to be a little less squishy and bouncy.

Don't get me wrong, I know I look pretty good for someone who has four kids. But I don't just want to be skinny for having four kids. I want to be skinny period.

Call it vain, call it selfish, but I want to be hot. Yes, I'm already hot, but that's just because the friction caused by my thighs rubbing together could start a fire faster than a Survivor contestant could with flint and steel.

I weighed myself in Sunday night after a weekend filled with all of my favorite, high calorie, fattening foods. I was (gulp, I so can't believe I'm about to say this here) 157 pounds. Really, I should have waited till all the high fat, high cal foods had had a chance to make their way to my thighs, because Monday I was 159. (I will remind you all, and tell all of you that don't know me, I am quite tall. I'm somewhere between 5'10" and 5'11", depending on the day.)

Yesterday, I was 153. Say what? Four pounds in three days? Must be a fluke. We will have to see. My goal is 140, but I'd be happy with 145, depending on how it all works out. (I'm thinking I have more than seven pounds sitting on my hips, thighs, and love handles, but I don't really know.) My driver's license says 135. That was true once. As long as I can get within ten pounds, It'll be good.

So here's the weight-loss plan:

1. Eat healthy, raw foods without as much butter and oil as usual.

2. Use the elliptical twice a day for as long as I can. I've gotten up to eight minutes a day now.

3. Eliminate the late-night ice cream, movie theater butter microwave popcorn, and chocolate consumption. Replace with raw almonds and yogurt.

4. I don't drink pop or coffee very often, so I'm good there.

5. Do a better job following through than I did HERE or HERE.

That's it. I'm not considering this a diet, just a healthier lifestyle change that may change back at various times during the year, namely, holidays, PMS, and the Fair.

Hey, a girl's gotta be flexible, right?


TheOldestStudent said...

I guess next week, I'll bring cake for everyone else and carrot sticks for you?

Vintage Dutch Girl said...

Girl, i'm WITH You on this one! Fighting 10 or 20 as well. Phew. Sounds exhausting just THINKING about losing weight. Maybe I should put the chocolate covered macadamia nuts away. That might help :)

DJan said...

I think you've got a really healthy sounding plan. For me, the biggest thing is to eat supper at a reasonable hour and nothing else after that. It's the snacking in the evenings that gets me. I'll be looking forward to hearing about your progress, and congrats on the elliptical!!!

Briana and Bella said...

you are right in not dieting -- its just a healthy lifestyle. And wow Tiff, I saw your photos and always thought you were skinny, regardless and I thought you must be tall but 5 foot 10 or 11!!!!!!
I am 5 foot 2 (or 1... depending on my posture) :P :)

Briana and Bella said...

also, read the posts you hyperlinked to -- i LOVE jillian michaels. I LOVE her!