Monday, April 5, 2010

Not Me! Monday!

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This was created by MckMama, head on over to her blog to see what she and everyone else have NOT been doing this week.

The Easter bunny pooped on our floor yesterday.


It seems every year, that darn bunny comes into my house, gives my kids copious amounts of sugar, and poops on the floor. So not only do I have wild, crazy, sugared up children, I have a pile or two of Easter Bunny poop to clean up.

I get tired of it.

This year, the Easter bunny poop had changed consistency a bit. Maybe he's a bigger bunny this year, it's certainly NOT because I was just a little sick of Raisinettes. The Easter Bunny poop was a bit more chocolate-covered-almond size.

There is NO WAY I decided I was just tired of it all, and told my five-year old to clean up the Easter Bunny poop. I am a hardworking mother and would NEVER have a child clean up a mess that a random fairy-tale-creature made.

She did NOT try really hard to convince me that the poop was actually candy. She is a smart child who knows to obey her mother, she would NEVER argue with me and say that poop is candy. Even if it was shaped like candy. And looked like candy. And tasted like candy. And you know, actually was candy, she still would know better that to argue with her mother.

My three oldest children most certainly did NOT fight over who got to eat the most Easter Bunny poop. Marty and I did NOT give a wonderful performance with our complete and total disgust that our darling children would actually consider eating poop.

Later in the day, my sweet, five year old Emma did NOT tell me, "Mom, you know the Easter Bunny isn't real." This did NOT surprise me, as I thought she still believed. "Mom," she leaned in close to whisper in my ear, knowing this was a secret to keep from her brothers, "it's actually a man in a bunny suit."

"What?!?" cane my shocked indignation, "Are you really telling me that the Easter Bunny isn't real?" She giggled and replied, "No, Mom, it's just a man!"

I stared her down for a minute. "So you are saying a man in a bunny suit came into our house, and pooped on the floor?!?"

She rolled her eyes and gave a big sigh. She is NOT perfecting her teenage angst at ridiculous, not with-it parents. "Moooom, it's just candy!"

We are either going to annoy the heck out of our kids when they are teens, or we are going to be the coolest parents ever.

We do NOT both agree that it is probably the first one.

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