Monday, January 26, 2009

Honest, Officer, I Am Not a Flasher!

I have never had a problem nursing in public. I am not one of those just-whip-it-out-and-feed moms, I try to be very discreet about the whole process. I try. It used to work. Until now.

I really thought that having my fourth baby would be so much easier. After nursing the twins for almost a year, just nursing one baby should be a piece of cake. At home, it really is easy. I can nurse while cooking, eating, peeing(not recommended,) breaking up fights, all kinds of things. There was one thing I did not count on in the world of nursing a singleton after twins. I forgot that I have twins.

We had finished our Costco shopping yesterday and headed to the food court area. Marty took the older kids and waited for a table while I was in line to pay for our cart full of stuff, then I went to the table that they had found and waited with all the boys while Marty and Emma went and got our food. The place was packed, typical Sunday afternoon. I needed to feed Drew, and the table we had was in the back of the area, so I was fine. For those who might not be familiar with Costco, they have a bunch of picnic style tables crammed as close together as possible. It does not make for a very private or comfortable meal, but the prices are great and it is in a warehouse, so you can't be picky. The twins were in the double stroller right behind the table along the back wall, so I sat on the side they were on, facing out into the crowd. I had Drew's blanket over my shoulder so everything would be covered. I tucked him in the blanket, and proceeded to start feeding. So far, so good.

Until all of a sudden, with no warning whatsoever, the blanket slipped off my shoulder, revealing everything to everyone around. I quickly put the blanket back, and refused to look around to see if anyone saw. I have no interest in knowing exactly who saw my business, I'd rather be ignorant on that one. I had everything positioned back where it needed to be, took a deep breath and was about to be brave enough to look around to see if anyone was still staring at me when it happened again! What was going on? I really do not want to be a flasher, but I was having a hard time keeping 'the girls' covered. Then I heard a giggle behind me. I slowly turned to see Ben right behind me, a sneaky smile on his face, and the corner of the blanket in his hand. He giggled again and gave it a tug, luckily this time I was able to catch it in time. This started a tug of war between myself and Ben, me with only one hand and twisted at a funny angle, and him in the perfect position to get me arrested for indecent exposure. It all ended with me not being able to move him or myself out of reach, but wiggling just enough to upset Drew, which made him let go of the food and subsequently get sprayed up the nose with milk. I was trying to discreetly clean the crying baby up, get him eating again, all the while clamping my chin to my left shoulder to attempt to keep the blanket in place. Ben was still laughing and tugging, and Grant was completely oblivious to everything, but was pointing and yelling at people, which was bringing some attention to the whole scenario. I am so grateful we did not know anyone there at the time, which is a rarity.

My next trip out of the house will include an investment in a great product my friend Erin has called a Hooter Hider. Anyone know where I can find one?

5 comments:

Love my babes said...

You crack me up. I have larangitis and it was a quiet laugh but serioulsy that is funny! Try Target-Holly got me one when Connor was a baby. Or else Babies R Us if you have one. Otherwise toys r us. Little stinker Ben life is never boring w/a mischievious one is it?

Bevy said...

Oh - that little BOY! :) What a waskily wabbit! I'm glad that you survived that ... HAHAHAHAHAHAA
Well maybe tucking that into your coat (if you're wearing one would serve you better and keep it out of the hands of that little boy. :)
I thot at first that your jacket was slippery and it just slipped off? Nope don't know where to find the hider thingy.
I don't think they have a restriction in your town on b'fdg in public ... THAT'S WHAT THEY'RE for - I'm glad you are using them for baby feedings.

Megan said...

I recently discovered your blog and I must say I get a chuckle out of most of them but this one in particular had me laughing out loud! I haven't had that particular incident happen to me but the milk-up-the-nose business is a constant event in my house. My son always unlatches to look around just as let-down happens. Breastfeeding is wonderfully unglorious!

Tracie said...

I didn't know if I should say anything or not, but since you brought it up....

I was at Costco, minding my own business, heading to the exit, when all of a sudden something caught my attention from the corner of my eye.....

My, oh my, what a sight that was!

Thank you?!?!?!?!?!
















ROFLOL :-)





Gordon

Kristl said...

http://shop.bebeaulait.com/nc

They're pricey at this shop, but I bet there are others somewhere closer and cheaper....