Thursday, March 19, 2009

Out Of The Mouths of Babes, Part 3

This morning, I was taking on the task of cleaning the kitchen. I forget how nasty the wall behind the stove gets, so I was de-greasing it when I heard this from the living room:

TV: Stay tuned, the Wonder Pets are coming up next!

Emma: The Wonder Pets! Boys, it's the Wonder Pets! We love the Wonder Pets, we NEVER get to watch it!

Grant: Wunnah Pets!

Ben: Eeeuust!

(I look at the clock, and realize that I missed TV off time, again. Oh, well, as long as I get the kitchen cleaned, does it matter if they watch one more show? Notsomuch.)

Emma: Hey! Mooommm! What button do I push?

Me: You shouldn't have to push a button. If it is coming up next, it will just come on on it's own.

Emma: But they are re-winding it!

Me: Who has the remote?

Emma: No one! They are pushing buttons and re-winding the TV! I know what I am talking about, mom!

Sure, you do.

I get my hands de-greased and go into the living room to find that the boys have changed the channel on the TV, making what we used to call polar-bear-in-a-snowstorm fuzz. I get the TV on the right channel, and the Wonder Pets fill the screen.

Cheers fill the room, and I feel like a super-hero. Maybe extended TV is not so bad, after all.

I go back to my task, and suddenly, Emma is yelling for me again.

Emma: Mom! Guess what! This is gonna pop my eyes off. Do you know what? There's sparklies, and the dog... is gonna... well... there were sparkles, and... this is so cool, Mom. This is gonna pop my eyes off it is so cool. There's this dog... and the... the sparklies... they are gonna save him! That's so cool, it's gonna pop my eyes off.

Me: Emma, what does that mean, it's going to pop your eyes off?

Emma: I don't know. But it's really cool.

And she wonders why I won't let her watch the "fun dancing people" in the Viagra ads. Can't you picture that one? "Hi, teacher, I'm Emma. My favorite TV show is How It's Made, and I like the commercial where the people are dancing and they are happy now that he can maintain an erection. That's so cool. Viva Viagra!"

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