It has been a DAY.
A day of tattling, whining, tattling, yelling, tattling, complaining, and tattling. My eye is twitching and even the cat has figured out that leaving me alone is really the safest option right now. This is not one of those days filled with joy and wonder of life viewed through the eyes of children, I am just ready for them to go to bed.
I was in the kitchen making dinner, when I heard a bicker starting. I firmly believe that parents who involve themselves in every sibling spat are setting their children up to never be able to resolve conflict on their own, so I kept chopping chicken and waited to hear the inevitable escalation. When Emma came into the kitchen and started with the "Mooom?!?" I took a deep breath before I answered her.
Exhale. Three hours till bedtime. I can do this. "Yes, dear?"
"Mom, could you encourage Grant a little? He's drawing a lollipop and he doesn't think he is doing a great job, but he is doing really well. Do you think you could give him some encouragement so he will feel better about his drawing?"
The concern in her voice sucked the remaining air out of my lungs, and I looked at her in awe.
Mama heart swoon.
It is nice to have those little reminders every once in a while, amidst the challenges of four kids and the fighting that goes with that, that they really and truly do care about each other.
Ben tried some encouragement of his own, "Gwant, that really is a good drawing. You are still a good draw-er, even if you are not as good as me!"
OK, it's still a work in progress.
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Blissful Freedom
Alrighty folks, it's official.
After close to eight years straight,
thousands of dollars spent,
countless hours and hours of my life,
many, many, MANY accidents involving bodily fluids on my legs and feet,
I don't even want to know what we did to the landfills of our country,
I have finally
officially
changed the very last diaper I will ever change on one of my children.
That's right,
Jack Jack is potty trained.
(and the heavens open, the angels sing, and the Great Beam of Light comes down, basking me with Glory and Peace and a much nicer smelling house)
I had all these plans for this time, rolling around in the buckets of money we would save, re-decorating my house with the extra time on my hands, and being filled with so much awesome at the new stage we have finally reached in our family. Instead, all the kids are going through a growth spurt at the same time, so all my buckets of money are going to food (seriously, one breakfast recently was two dozen eggs, a whole pineapple, a double batch of pancakes, and a whole package of bacon; and that was just the kids, Marty and I didn't eat,) which just leads to even more trips to Costco with one more boy who pees.
Still.
Angel choir.
Monday, March 19, 2012
Even the Government Knows About Our Crazy
I was recently having a conversation with my friend Kristen and we were talking about the square footage of our houses. Now, our house is small for America's standard for housing six people, but we make do. I thought our house was 1,300 square feet, but then Kristen said her house was 1,300 square feet, but her house has two living areas, and I just know it's bigger than mine. So I went on a hunt to see what the square footage of our house really is. Not that it matters, but I was curious.
Yes, this is sounding like a really boring blog post. But keep reading, it gets better.
Being that we live in an older double-wide mobile home, it's a perfect rectangle and measuring was easy. I measured the inside of the house, and included the walls and came up with 1,102 square feet. Marty said that was wrong because I needed to measure from the outside, but I don't think there is any way that I missed a whole 200 square feet just in the exterior walls. So I hit up the county assessor's website and checked, and it said our house was 1,323 square feet. I looked up Kristen's house and according to the assessor, the square footage is identical to ours at 1,323 square feet.
It is really weird that it's the exact same number, right?. Let's focus on that weirdage and not the fact that I actually looked up a friend's house on the assessor's website, m'kay?
I went back to the assessor's page for our house, and out of curiosity, clicked some of the other tabs. Didja know that there's tons of info available for every house on that site? It's really interesting. I looked under the "Property Image" tab, and was surprised to find a recent picture of our house, it looks like it was taken last spring or summer. The van is there, so we were home. I'm going to ignore the fact that somehow I didn't notice someone photographing our house. You can't tell from the picture, but the entire driveway area is fully fenced as well, so there's no way someone could just do a drive-by-picture. They actually entered our property and I didn't notice. Maybe I was busy cleaning up pee.
I was happy to see that amazingly, the flowerbeds looked pretty recently weeded and the sidewalk was relatively clear of toys and bikes. Of course, there is the ever-present grass growing in the driveway, but whatever. I like our house. It has very cute curb-appeal for being a 23 year old mobile home, don'tchathink?
Then I looked a bit closer. If you click on the picture, you can enlarge it a little and see what I saw.
Do you see it?
Imagine my shock and laughter that erupted so loudly that everyone came running when I discovered that the county assessor's website has a picture of my cute little house, all sunny and cheery and looking adorable.
With Drew standing in the windowsill.
Topless.
Not only do I have this blog to document the challenges of raising this spirited child, now the government has photographic evidence as well.
Only my child.
Yes, this is sounding like a really boring blog post. But keep reading, it gets better.
Being that we live in an older double-wide mobile home, it's a perfect rectangle and measuring was easy. I measured the inside of the house, and included the walls and came up with 1,102 square feet. Marty said that was wrong because I needed to measure from the outside, but I don't think there is any way that I missed a whole 200 square feet just in the exterior walls. So I hit up the county assessor's website and checked, and it said our house was 1,323 square feet. I looked up Kristen's house and according to the assessor, the square footage is identical to ours at 1,323 square feet.
It is really weird that it's the exact same number, right?. Let's focus on that weirdage and not the fact that I actually looked up a friend's house on the assessor's website, m'kay?
I went back to the assessor's page for our house, and out of curiosity, clicked some of the other tabs. Didja know that there's tons of info available for every house on that site? It's really interesting. I looked under the "Property Image" tab, and was surprised to find a recent picture of our house, it looks like it was taken last spring or summer. The van is there, so we were home. I'm going to ignore the fact that somehow I didn't notice someone photographing our house. You can't tell from the picture, but the entire driveway area is fully fenced as well, so there's no way someone could just do a drive-by-picture. They actually entered our property and I didn't notice. Maybe I was busy cleaning up pee.
Then I looked a bit closer. If you click on the picture, you can enlarge it a little and see what I saw.
Do you see it?
Imagine my shock and laughter that erupted so loudly that everyone came running when I discovered that the county assessor's website has a picture of my cute little house, all sunny and cheery and looking adorable.
With Drew standing in the windowsill.
Topless.
Not only do I have this blog to document the challenges of raising this spirited child, now the government has photographic evidence as well.
Only my child.
Friday, March 16, 2012
Today in a Nutshell
Today was typical, but different in that I intentionally wrote things down that were funny and/or cute so I could blog them. Here is today, in a nutshell.
This morning, in the mad rush to get Emma out the door and to the bus, I found Drew (a.k.a Jack Jack) who had made little steps out of his dresser drawers, teetering at the top trying to reach his backpack. While I am used to his antics, the memory of climbing my own dresser as a child and having it fall and being trapped underneath came rushing back.Luckily Purposefully, their dresser is long and wide instead of tall, so the danger of it tipping was quite minimal. But still. It's like he wants to go to the hospital again.
In true Jack Jack style, each of the four steps was perfectly spaced out from each other in an even, symmetrical stair-step pattern. He's like an OCD Evel Kenevil.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Overheard this morning at the breakfast table:
Ben: "You're grumpy, Grant."
Grant: (yelling) "NO I'M NOT!!"
Ben: "I found grumpy eyebrows on you."
Grant: (scowling) "When I'm done eating I'm gonna tackle you."
I almost choked trying not to laugh. Ah, the joy of five year old twins. I do have to say, I'm really proud that they are using their words.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Emma was perusing her baby book this morning. Her lovely, wonderfully scrapbooked album of memories, perfectly preserved and kept right next to the twins' empty scrapbooks, which still have the cellophane wrapped around them. Those are right next to the empty space that Drew's scrapbook might someday go if I ever buy one and/or get photos printed from his first year of life. Ahh, the progression of having four kids in four years.
Anywhoo, Emma was looking through the pictures, and exclaimed, "Oh, here's one of me crying with Daddy!" I lovingly responded, like the best mothers do, "he's probably picking on you." She came back with, "let me see here. Yup! he IS picking on me!"
Photographic evidence that the need for us to save for our kids' future therapy started really early.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We went to Costco. Yeah. My lovely husband met me on his lunch break, and we had a hot date with Costco hot dogs and a cart full of little boys. We got what we needed and as soon as we hit the checkout, Jack Jack predictably announced that he had to go potty, which set off a long string of boys exclaiming their need to pee. Marty innocently asked, "do you want to take them?" to which I replied, "no way, Jose. I don't want to take them to the bathroom, are you nuts?"
So he offered. And as he was taking the kids out of the cart, he said, "now there is one rule. Don't pee on each other, OK?" The man in line in front of us laughed, and commented, "that's a good rule right there." I responded,"dude, if you only knew" "well, we haven't always had the best of luck in this place."
Marty took them potty. I didn't ask how it went, but everyone seemed in good spirits and not reeking of urine when they came out of the bathroom, so I'll call it a successful Costco bathroom trip.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We picked Emma up from the bus, and headed straight out to get some groceries. On the way, I asked her, "How was your day today?" She responded quickly, almost like she was out of breath even starting. "Well, it was a good day, but I got my feelings hurt at last recess because a boy in Kindergarten made a sand castle at first recess, and by second recess it was gone, but I was building a big sand castle and he thought that I messed up his castle, but I didn't do anything, it was gone when I started building. But I built the biggest, most beautiful sand castle ever, and I went to go get some rocks to decorate it and he stomped all over it and wrecked it." Her voice wavered, and her eyes filled with unshed tears. I immediately responded, "oh, baby! I am so sorry, that would hurt my feelings, too." The twins were listening from the back of the van, and commiserated with her, Grant saying, "that's not fair, he shouldn't wreck your project!" Ben, calmly in his little-Ben way, said, "Emma, when I go to Kindergarten next year, you show me who he is, and I'll have a talk with him."
And this Mama grinned from ear to ear all the way to the Green Barn.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In another conversation, Grant asked for something at the Green Barn. The Green Barn is our local produce stand, it's awesome and fantastic and we love it. Anywhoo, Grant wanted "that thingy that I don't remember. But it's like Brussels Sprouts, but all scrunched up like leaves hooked together." I was intrigued. After carefully searching the Green Barn, he realized what he was wanting Savoy Cabbage, so we bought one. Now I have to figure out what to make with it in the next few days.
Menu planning by the whims of children is a common thing around here, as long as the whims of the children include veggies.
This morning, in the mad rush to get Emma out the door and to the bus, I found Drew (a.k.a Jack Jack) who had made little steps out of his dresser drawers, teetering at the top trying to reach his backpack. While I am used to his antics, the memory of climbing my own dresser as a child and having it fall and being trapped underneath came rushing back.
In true Jack Jack style, each of the four steps was perfectly spaced out from each other in an even, symmetrical stair-step pattern. He's like an OCD Evel Kenevil.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Overheard this morning at the breakfast table:
Ben: "You're grumpy, Grant."
Grant: (yelling) "NO I'M NOT!!"
Ben: "I found grumpy eyebrows on you."
Grant: (scowling) "When I'm done eating I'm gonna tackle you."
I almost choked trying not to laugh. Ah, the joy of five year old twins. I do have to say, I'm really proud that they are using their words.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Emma was perusing her baby book this morning. Her lovely, wonderfully scrapbooked album of memories, perfectly preserved and kept right next to the twins' empty scrapbooks, which still have the cellophane wrapped around them. Those are right next to the empty space that Drew's scrapbook might someday go if I ever buy one and/or get photos printed from his first year of life. Ahh, the progression of having four kids in four years.
Anywhoo, Emma was looking through the pictures, and exclaimed, "Oh, here's one of me crying with Daddy!" I lovingly responded, like the best mothers do, "he's probably picking on you." She came back with, "let me see here. Yup! he IS picking on me!"
Photographic evidence that the need for us to save for our kids' future therapy started really early.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We went to Costco. Yeah. My lovely husband met me on his lunch break, and we had a hot date with Costco hot dogs and a cart full of little boys. We got what we needed and as soon as we hit the checkout, Jack Jack predictably announced that he had to go potty, which set off a long string of boys exclaiming their need to pee. Marty innocently asked, "do you want to take them?" to which I replied, "no way, Jose. I don't want to take them to the bathroom, are you nuts?"
So he offered. And as he was taking the kids out of the cart, he said, "now there is one rule. Don't pee on each other, OK?" The man in line in front of us laughed, and commented, "that's a good rule right there." I responded,
Marty took them potty. I didn't ask how it went, but everyone seemed in good spirits and not reeking of urine when they came out of the bathroom, so I'll call it a successful Costco bathroom trip.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We picked Emma up from the bus, and headed straight out to get some groceries. On the way, I asked her, "How was your day today?" She responded quickly, almost like she was out of breath even starting. "Well, it was a good day, but I got my feelings hurt at last recess because a boy in Kindergarten made a sand castle at first recess, and by second recess it was gone, but I was building a big sand castle and he thought that I messed up his castle, but I didn't do anything, it was gone when I started building. But I built the biggest, most beautiful sand castle ever, and I went to go get some rocks to decorate it and he stomped all over it and wrecked it." Her voice wavered, and her eyes filled with unshed tears. I immediately responded, "oh, baby! I am so sorry, that would hurt my feelings, too." The twins were listening from the back of the van, and commiserated with her, Grant saying, "that's not fair, he shouldn't wreck your project!" Ben, calmly in his little-Ben way, said, "Emma, when I go to Kindergarten next year, you show me who he is, and I'll have a talk with him."
And this Mama grinned from ear to ear all the way to the Green Barn.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In another conversation, Grant asked for something at the Green Barn. The Green Barn is our local produce stand, it's awesome and fantastic and we love it. Anywhoo, Grant wanted "that thingy that I don't remember. But it's like Brussels Sprouts, but all scrunched up like leaves hooked together." I was intrigued. After carefully searching the Green Barn, he realized what he was wanting Savoy Cabbage, so we bought one. Now I have to figure out what to make with it in the next few days.
Menu planning by the whims of children is a common thing around here, as long as the whims of the children include veggies.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Blogging and facebook
UPDATE: OK, the word is slipped, not spilled. It was TOTALLY a contest to see who caught my typo, congrats to Shari! I mean, I would NEVER just completely replace a word with the wrong word, re-read it twice and not notice; it was obviously intentional and I am grateful that Shari figured it out! Grammar police, I am NOT holding a contest to count how many times I start a sentence with "and" or "but" or end with a preposition. Those I don't care about at all, and I'm going to pretend that's part of my charm. ;)
Original post, edited to fix the typo that Shari won the contest for:
I decided to give up facebook for lent. I know, for some it's not a real sacrifice, but for me, facebook was quickly becoming too much of a focus during the day. I could just hop on and read what people were up to, make a few comments and likes and then get up and get to work, but I was finding that I was just hopping on for a quick couple of minutes several times an hour. I would finish the dishes and one of the boys would want me to read him a story and I would tell him, "Sure, buddy, right after I check something on the computer really quick." Putting my children off for facebook is never a good thing. Having your focus on something that was not God or family is never a good thing either.
I wanted some time to get away from the draw of it all, and lent seemed like the perfect time to do it. I could take the time to re-adjust my focus and have the kids and my Bible become my first priority, have those things be what draws me after I finish the dishes after lunch. So far, it's going well.
Well, kind of.
I didn't realize how much I relied on the comments that would come after I posted something funny that the kids did. That is quite often my only interaction with grownups besides my husband, and I miss it. Quite often, something will happen, and I've already started mentally writing the facebook post in my head before it catches up to me that I won't be posting. That part is tough. I miss the comments, the back and forth that comes from an online chat with friends that can happen while the kids are screaming and I haven't showered.
And seriously, y'all, I actually slipped on a banana peel yesterday. For reals. I honestly didn't think that was actually possible, but I did it. The heel of my shoe landed on the edge of a peel that was right next to the garbage can (thank you, small children) and my heel went skidding forward and I tensed my leg in that way you do to try to keep from doing the splits, and I pulled my groin muscle just a little bit but enough that it hurt for the rest of the day.
It was a banana-peel injury. A banana-peeljury. A banajury.
Clearly, I need to get out more.
Anywhoo, since Ash Wednesday, my house has been cleaner, I have started three or four new projects (but not finished any of them, because some things never change) and I have spent more time in the Bible. Those are good things. Well, the primed-but-not-painted laundry room is half of a good thing, but it will be a good thing when I am done. Until then, the laundry is just lined up against the hallway and is slowly creeping into the living room. But to be honest, just the dull, flat primer covering the totally rad late-eighties printed wallboard is a huge improvement, even with the blue painter's tape and the fact that we can't put the laundry hamper in there.
I will try to blog more often, but I kind of have this mental block that facebook statuses can be short but blog posts have to be long. I never used to be that way, and I'm going to try to get over it. I need to blog about things other than getting peed on at Costco, because while those posts do great things for my blog traffic, I hope to never have to post another one of those again. Sorry, folks, I like to be here for your entertainment, but a girl's gotta draw the line somewhere.
It's called boundaries, people.
(Although I did offer to get peed on for a dear friend recently who was having a bad day. I am willing to make sacrifices for those I care deeply about. That's love.)
Clearly, I'm starting to ramble, so I'll end this before I make an even bigger fool of myself, and I'll go get some more coffee. Oh, yeah, I started drinking coffee recently! I am kind of wondering how I survived the last ten years or so without it, but I'm learning quickly. Coffee with creamer and some hot cocoa mix is fabulous, by the way.
If you wouldn't mind, could you kindly leave a comment on this post so I know you read it, and to save me from the rapidly approaching insanity? I love comments. And coffee. Thanks, you guys rock!
Original post, edited to fix the typo that Shari won the contest for:
I decided to give up facebook for lent. I know, for some it's not a real sacrifice, but for me, facebook was quickly becoming too much of a focus during the day. I could just hop on and read what people were up to, make a few comments and likes and then get up and get to work, but I was finding that I was just hopping on for a quick couple of minutes several times an hour. I would finish the dishes and one of the boys would want me to read him a story and I would tell him, "Sure, buddy, right after I check something on the computer really quick." Putting my children off for facebook is never a good thing. Having your focus on something that was not God or family is never a good thing either.
I wanted some time to get away from the draw of it all, and lent seemed like the perfect time to do it. I could take the time to re-adjust my focus and have the kids and my Bible become my first priority, have those things be what draws me after I finish the dishes after lunch. So far, it's going well.
Well, kind of.
I didn't realize how much I relied on the comments that would come after I posted something funny that the kids did. That is quite often my only interaction with grownups besides my husband, and I miss it. Quite often, something will happen, and I've already started mentally writing the facebook post in my head before it catches up to me that I won't be posting. That part is tough. I miss the comments, the back and forth that comes from an online chat with friends that can happen while the kids are screaming and I haven't showered.
And seriously, y'all, I actually slipped on a banana peel yesterday. For reals. I honestly didn't think that was actually possible, but I did it. The heel of my shoe landed on the edge of a peel that was right next to the garbage can (thank you, small children) and my heel went skidding forward and I tensed my leg in that way you do to try to keep from doing the splits, and I pulled my groin muscle just a little bit but enough that it hurt for the rest of the day.
It was a banana-peel injury. A banana-peeljury. A banajury.
Clearly, I need to get out more.
Anywhoo, since Ash Wednesday, my house has been cleaner, I have started three or four new projects (but not finished any of them, because some things never change) and I have spent more time in the Bible. Those are good things. Well, the primed-but-not-painted laundry room is half of a good thing, but it will be a good thing when I am done. Until then, the laundry is just lined up against the hallway and is slowly creeping into the living room. But to be honest, just the dull, flat primer covering the totally rad late-eighties printed wallboard is a huge improvement, even with the blue painter's tape and the fact that we can't put the laundry hamper in there.
I will try to blog more often, but I kind of have this mental block that facebook statuses can be short but blog posts have to be long. I never used to be that way, and I'm going to try to get over it. I need to blog about things other than getting peed on at Costco, because while those posts do great things for my blog traffic, I hope to never have to post another one of those again. Sorry, folks, I like to be here for your entertainment, but a girl's gotta draw the line somewhere.
It's called boundaries, people.
(Although I did offer to get peed on for a dear friend recently who was having a bad day. I am willing to make sacrifices for those I care deeply about. That's love.)
Clearly, I'm starting to ramble, so I'll end this before I make an even bigger fool of myself, and I'll go get some more coffee. Oh, yeah, I started drinking coffee recently! I am kind of wondering how I survived the last ten years or so without it, but I'm learning quickly. Coffee with creamer and some hot cocoa mix is fabulous, by the way.
If you wouldn't mind, could you kindly leave a comment on this post so I know you read it, and to save me from the rapidly approaching insanity? I love comments. And coffee. Thanks, you guys rock!
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Costco, Revisited
We went to Costco yesterday.
Not noteworthy for most people, I know. But if you have been around Still Seeking Sanity for any length of time, you know that Costco and my kids have a history.
And sometimes, even when you do your darndest to stop it, history repeats itself.
Yeah.
So my whole plan in Costco has been to avoid the bathrooms at all costs. It seemed like a reasonable plan, but I forgot the diaper bag yesterday and Drew had filled his diaper to the point that the ever-popular scrape-out-the-bulk-of-it-and-line-it-with-paper-towels backup plan wasn't an option (oh come on, you know you've done that); so he was wearing undies while we were out running errands. And as any mother of a not-quite potty-trained child knows, if the kid says he has to pee, you take him to pee.
Even if you are in Costco.
We had a chat as we walked down the hallway. It went something like this, "You will not pee on each other. At all. Got it?"
I know, that's quality parenting at it's best right there.
Ben was walking down the hallway playing with all the padlocks on the employee lockers and apparently not listening to his mother, because he missed the memo.
So into the bathroom we went. Emma into her own stall, and the boys and I in another. I like to keep them close, so I can monitor the flow, if you will.
But I only have two eyes, and there are three flows. I kept an eye on Grant, to make sure he got his pants down far enough so we wouldn't have a repeat performance. I watched Drew, who is still learning and is likely to "miss". However I didn't watch Ben, who was trying to sword-fight with his brother's, uhm, stream and decided that the best place to cross his stream with Grant's was just as it was leaving Grant's body.
So basically, in a nutshell, Ben peed on Grant's legs and pants on purpose.
Once again, I didn't know it was happening at the time. Grant started screaming as I was holding Drew up to the level he needed to be, and I didn't see it at first. Then Grant hollered, "BEN! You are peeing on my legs!" To which I said something calm, cool, and collected, something like, "Are you freaking kidding me?!? What did I say about not peeing on each other this time?!? Ben, what on earth are you thinking?!?"
And the mother of the year award goes to....
Probably not me.
Emma, who was a couple of stalls down, yelled "Seriously, they peed on each other AGAIN?!?" And I didn't even want to think about what everyone else was thinking, because like every time this happens, every stall was full.
Thankfully, it wasn't the entire bladder's full. And thankfully, Grant was wearing warm-up pants so it all wiped off pretty easily.
And I had a sudden, earth-shattering realization of how crazy my life actually is when I replied to my daughter across a full public bathroom, "Don't worry, honey, it was just a little bit of pee and it is cleaning up pretty easily. No big deal, it's not as bad as last time."
Not noteworthy for most people, I know. But if you have been around Still Seeking Sanity for any length of time, you know that Costco and my kids have a history.
And sometimes, even when you do your darndest to stop it, history repeats itself.
Yeah.
So my whole plan in Costco has been to avoid the bathrooms at all costs. It seemed like a reasonable plan, but I forgot the diaper bag yesterday and Drew had filled his diaper to the point that the ever-popular scrape-out-the-bulk-of-it-and-line-it-with-paper-towels backup plan wasn't an option (oh come on, you know you've done that); so he was wearing undies while we were out running errands. And as any mother of a not-quite potty-trained child knows, if the kid says he has to pee, you take him to pee.
Even if you are in Costco.
We had a chat as we walked down the hallway. It went something like this, "You will not pee on each other. At all. Got it?"
I know, that's quality parenting at it's best right there.
Ben was walking down the hallway playing with all the padlocks on the employee lockers and apparently not listening to his mother, because he missed the memo.
So into the bathroom we went. Emma into her own stall, and the boys and I in another. I like to keep them close, so I can monitor the flow, if you will.
But I only have two eyes, and there are three flows. I kept an eye on Grant, to make sure he got his pants down far enough so we wouldn't have a repeat performance. I watched Drew, who is still learning and is likely to "miss". However I didn't watch Ben, who was trying to sword-fight with his brother's, uhm, stream and decided that the best place to cross his stream with Grant's was just as it was leaving Grant's body.
So basically, in a nutshell, Ben peed on Grant's legs and pants on purpose.
Once again, I didn't know it was happening at the time. Grant started screaming as I was holding Drew up to the level he needed to be, and I didn't see it at first. Then Grant hollered, "BEN! You are peeing on my legs!" To which I said something calm, cool, and collected, something like, "Are you freaking kidding me?!? What did I say about not peeing on each other this time?!? Ben, what on earth are you thinking?!?"
And the mother of the year award goes to....
Probably not me.
Emma, who was a couple of stalls down, yelled "Seriously, they peed on each other AGAIN?!?" And I didn't even want to think about what everyone else was thinking, because like every time this happens, every stall was full.
Thankfully, it wasn't the entire bladder's full. And thankfully, Grant was wearing warm-up pants so it all wiped off pretty easily.
And I had a sudden, earth-shattering realization of how crazy my life actually is when I replied to my daughter across a full public bathroom, "Don't worry, honey, it was just a little bit of pee and it is cleaning up pretty easily. No big deal, it's not as bad as last time."
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Cat vs Tooth Fairy
It was assisted slightly by my darling husband, who has a tendency to assist children in losing loose teeth without even knowing that he is helping. What a guy.
Anywhoo, she was in bed and called out, "My tooth! I lost a tooth!!" She was so excited, and we went in to cheer with her, both of us showing our excitement and joy while wracking our brains to figure out if we had a dollar in our wallets.
After the celebration and subsequent necessary showing of the tooth to the brothers, she headed off to bed and we found a dollar, rolled it up an waited for her to fall asleep.
However, Emma sleeps with her cat. And we could hear her in her room, talking to her cat. "If I wake up and there's no tooth, and no dollar, then I know you ate the Tooth Fairy. That's not OK. Teddy, do not eat the Tooth Fairy, understand?!?"
OK, anyone who knows us knows that we couldn't just let that one go.
And hopefully, the cat learned his lesson. I mean, really. You don't ever take on Fairy Tale creatures, that's just common sense.
Here's the sweet girl, who apparently slept through the whole battle. When she woke and figured out what had happened, she saw the cat fur and Fairy Dust on her sheets next to her pillow and exclaimed, "Oh, this must be where it all started!"
 | |
Emma's new toothbrush, broken open and also covered in Fairy Dust and cat fur. Apparently, she beat him off with it. At least she's a resourceful little Fairy!
And the cat, looking mildly ticked off, missing a couple of hunks of fur, and slightly glitter-y between the eyes.
 | |
| Don't ask. |
As for Emma, she seems curious and slightly baffled. I am interested in hearing her reaction when she comes home from school and has had some time to think it over. She cuddled the cat this morning, offering her sympathy for what he went through last night while gently scolding him for attacking the Tooth Fairy. He was not amused.
I just hope he doesn't try to get revenge some night when I am sleeping. I might want to start sleeping with some Fairy Dust....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)